Hic Town

One of my college roommates/besties just had a baby girl named Kyla, who is maybe the cutest thing going in the under-two-week set. While I was over there gaping and marveling at her teeny little fingernails and eyelashes, she did something amazing. (No, she didn't talk. Seriously, get real). She hiccuped. And her mom (weird, my friend is a mom) said that she has had hiccups a lot (I mean, a lot for an 8-day old), and that the doctor said that some people are just more prone to them than others. And when I heard that, my affection and sense of loyalty to this little squirmer - which were already pretty high for someone I just met - shot off the charts, because suddenly I knew that she and I had something in common (I mean, in addition to our favorite hobbies- sleeping and eating). Because, I am ALSO a hiccup-afflicted individual! And before you wiseacres pipe in, it's not just because I drink a lot of beer, so shut it- I've been hiccuping abnormally oftenly since I was but a tiny tot myself. In fact, my mom says I got them moments after I emerged from the womb, although I can't verify that information myself, because I don't remember that day very clearly. I was probably too distracted by the hiccups to take much notice of anything.

Anyway, all of this is to say that over the intervening years, I have become a bit of an expert on the hiccups- what they are, why they happen, and how to get rid of them, as I suspect my friend's poor baby will have to do, as well, as a fellow sufferer, once she is no longer a baby. So, as a gift to this wee human (who needs another bib?), I decided to put down the veritable hiccup encyclopedia that I have in my brain for posterity.  I give you:

Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About the Hiccups if You Are a Baby or Adult Who Gets Hiccups A Lot



What Are Hiccups?
Hiccups, or hiccoughs, if you like to spell things the pretentious way, are involuntary spasms of the diaphragm or esophagus caused by a reflex triggered by the vagus nerve. You don't really need to know that, except if you are ever on a game show, and they ask you that specific question (if that happens, you should probably send me some of the money you win- it's only fair). Also, it's good to understand that for when I reference the vagus nerve in a pun the next paragraph.


What Causes Them?

There are many ways of overstimulating or irritating the vagus nerve, triggering hiccups. You can do it by eating too fast, or too much, or spicy foods, by swallowing air, taking some medications, laughing a lot, or drinking alcohol or carbonated beverages- pretty much anything fun). In other words, what happens in vagus does not stay in vagus. (That joke was so worth it). So, theoretically, you could try to avoid getting the hiccups by eating small, bland meals very slowly, accompanied by flat, non-alcoholic beverages for the rest of your life. Or you can just find yourself a sure-fire, never-fail, hiccup cure, and be happy. Here's what works for me.


How to Cure Hiccups
The way to cure hiccups is to essentially "reset" the vagus nerve by stimulating it in another way. Here are some methods that work:

1. Hold Your Breath: Interrupting your breathing patterns typically will end your hiccups. The best way I've found is to take in a deep breath and hold it as long as you can, while swallowing a few times. Hold your breath until you turn red in the face, and then a few seconds after that.



2. Drink Water Upside-Down: This is the cure that works the most consistently for me. Unfortunately, it also is the most ridiculous-looking one. Fill a glass of water to the brim, plant your feet a few feet apart, bend at the waist, and drink from the wrong side of the glass.


3. Sugar Overload- Put a tablespoon of sugar or a sugar cube in your mouth and let it dissolve on your tongue. The extreme sweetness will jar your nerves.


4. Pull On Your Tongue- No idea why this works, but it does- stick out your tongue, grab it with your fingers, and pull it outward for a few seconds.


5. Get Tickled- Seriously, if the thought doesn't make you super uncomfortable, ask someone to tickle you- it will make the hiccups disappear. Personally, I'd rather drink water upside-down.


6. Take an Antacid- Antacids containing magnesium (Rolaids, Milk of Magnesia) can help calm the nerves, almost instantly. 



"Cures" That Aren't Worth It
Sadly, because everyone and their mom has a favorite hiccups cure, there are a lot of terrible ones floating around out there. These ones might work, but just don't seem worth the effort, really. 


1. Drink Vinegar- Um, gross. Also, all that acid can't be good for your teeth.

2. Get Scared- Seriously, have you ever seen this work? There's nothing scary about your friend saying "boo" when you're expecting it.

3. Stand On Your Head: Oh, for Pete's sake. What's more inconvenient- finding a place to safely stand on your head without flashing the other bar patrons, or having the hiccups for a few minutes? (Kyla, honey, Aunt Lily will explain what "flashing" and "bars" are when you're a little older).

One final note: if your hiccups last longer than a couple hours, or are impeding your ability to eat or sleep, stop reading blogs, and go see a medical professional.

Picture This

JM and I have lived in our "new" apartment for almost two and half years, now. In that time, I've painted every room, put up wallpaper and wood paneling, refinished the floors, and arranged and rearranged the furniture in every room at least twenty times. But, for some reason, we had not hung up hardly any of our artwork. We simply couldn't commit or agree on what should go where, so instead we left all our paintings and prints stacked in a corner of our kitchen, cluttering up our house as their frames got dinged and our walls stayed bare. It was madness, I tell you, madness. Finally, last weekend, we came to our collective senses, and decided that hanging artwork anywhere, even if it wasn't the perfectly right place, was better than the status quo of no artwork, nowhere.

One thing we agreed on was that our tiny guest room/office needed a serious artsy pick-me-up. But the room is so narrow, we were concerned that hanging anything on the main sidewalls would make it feel claustrophobic in there. The solution? Lots of pieces arranged on the smaller walls, all the way to the high ceiling (to emphasize the air up there).

Whenever you are hanging a bunch of artwork on one wall, it's important to play around with the arrangement to make sure it all fits together, and the proportions work in the space. A good way to do this, without committing to hammer and nail, is to cut out paper sheets the same size as each of your pieces of art. (We used newspaper, which works well, because it's readily available, free, and comes in big sheets. But if you go this route keep in mind you may have to Mr. Clean Magic Eraser some ink smudges off your walls when your done).  Make sure to label each paper with which piece it represents, and which way is "up"). Then, use masking or painter's tape (so your walls won't be damaged) to play around and arrange the paper pieces on your wall, until you are happy with the way they look and fit together.

Measure the length from the top of the frames to the hanging wires, and mark the distance on each sheet. Then you can simple hammer the hanging hook (I like this kind, $5.70 for 50 pieces, from Amazon.com) right through the paper, for perfect placement. Rip the paper away, throw the art up on the hooks, and voila! - perfectly spaced art. So much easier than rearranging the furniture.

I Like To Move It, Move It

To answer your question ("Where ARE you?"), I'm back in California this week. The purpose of this trip is multi-fold: I'm visiting my parents before the holidays (as we will be spending both Thanksgiving and Christmas with JM's family this year), I attended a family milestone birthday party, I'm checking up on my baby brother-in-law who recently moved to L.A., and I'm running a half-marathon on Saturday. Here's the thing: Whenever I'm out here, I am struck by how active my days are. And without my even trying (half-marathon aside, of course)! It seems like all the fun things I do- swimming in the pool, going to the beach, playing croquet, volleyball or Frisbee (if you can, in fact, call my efforts "playing Frisbee"- I might be the only person in the universe incapable of putting spin on a Frisbee), hiking, yoga, chasing after my friend's baby- are all inherently active and athletic pursuits. In fact, the only thing I do that isn't exercise is sun-bathing, and even then, I break a serious sweat. It's like the exercise just happens without my even thinking about it.
Which, now that I think about it, is probably why my parents, who are senior citizens, actually look more like seniors in college (okay, that may be a slight exaggeration, but you get the idea). It seems like instead of allocating an hour at the gym every day, you can achieve similar, or better, health results just by keeping moving all the time. So my new motto for life (I have a few of them), is "Just Keep Moving".
Here are just a few healthy habits for things you can do in your real life to keep your body in shape, without setting foot in a gym. Admittedly, these aren't as much fun as beach volleyball, but they sure beat the treadmill.


-Walk It: Instead of taking the car, walk your errands (or even better, run them). Carry your laundry to the cleaners and pick up your dinner as take-out, instead of having it delivered. Take the stairs instead of the elevator (or better yet, move into a 5th-floor walk-up, like us). If you have to drive, park on the far side of the parking lot and walk across, like my dad does.

-Bike It: Put the new bike lanes in New York City to use, and bike to work and around the city. Just please wear a helmet- if the pedaling doesn't get your heart pounding, near accidents with taxis certainly will. It's just like Spinning class, but without that hamster-on-a-wheel feeling.

-Carry It: Instead of getting a cart at the grocery store, grab a basket. You'll work your biceps carrying it around, and you'll be less likely to buy junk you don't need. And while you're at it, bring your own bags to the store and carry your groceries home yourself (this is especially good exercise if you live in a walk-up, see?)

-Build It: Earlier this week, I assembled my parents' new grill. At one point, I was in a crunch position for about ten minutes attaching two parts, and I realized that even that is pretty decent exercise. So next time you make a run to Ikea, load the car and assemble it yourself. And since you'll have to deal with sorting out all those screws and washers and deciphering those directions, this one will be a good exercise for your brain, too.

-Fix It: Anyone who has ever tried to move a toilet, or held a 50-lb lighting fixture while someone else screwed it in to the ceiling, knows that DIY is as good for your bod as it is for your house. And it's so rewarding!

-Clean It: Next time you have to clean your place, put on your workout gear and some pump-up tunes (I recommend Sean Paul), and treat it like it's exercise. It'll be a better workout than a jazzercise tape, and you'll get so much more done.

-Grow It: If you have the space (and green thumb) for it, start a garden. Shoveling, weeding, mowing, hoeing, mulching and watering are all great exercise, and you'll have pretty flowers or tasty veggies to show for it (in addition to your rock-hard abs).

Here's hoping this moves you!

Selling Power

Earlier this week, I dropped my phone, shattering the display glass (prompting my ever-so-tactful husband to sigh and say, "maybe you just shouldn't own fragile things"). After I shot him a steely glare of fury, I decided that instead of paying someone to repair the phone, I would do it myself (in my typical, frugal, DIY way) using a kit I got off the Internet, and instructions via Youtube. I have a good sense of the mechanical, and better-than-average fix-it skills, and the nerds in the video made the repair process look like a breeze, so I really thought I had it in the bag.  But as I was trying to pry the little fragments of broken glass off the phone, I heard an ominous crunch from inside the phone, which portended what I already knew to be true- I had made a bad situation much, much worse.  All of this is to say that I had an unexpected major expense this week in the form of a new cell phone.

In order to offset the cost, and for a fun little goal for myself, I decided I should try to recoup my loss by selling stuff from around the house. Drawing inspiration and advice from my friend Rachel, who has sold more stuff than Ron Popeil, I got out my digital camera, and set to work. Here are the best ways to sell your stuff- even the junk you think is worthless- to easily get some quick cash. Remember, one girl's trash is another girl's brand new iPhone 4. Or something like that.

EBay: I have long been an eBay buyer, but I recently took my first foray into selling. Almost anything you want to sell, you can find a buyer for on eBay. I mostly have sold clothes- anything brand name in good condition will fetch you at least a few bucks- just take flattering photos of the article on a hanger against a white background. Be honest about any flaws, and start the bidding low. I suggest listing a bunch of things all at once- people who like one of your items might check out the others, and you'll save yourself a bunch of trips to the post office when you ship them.


Craig's List: If you live in a fairly metropolitan area, you should list your items on your local Craig's List. I have used Craig's List to sell old furniture and household goods. Again, nice pictures that show the item in a flattering light are a must. Check to see what the going rate is for similar items, and undercut it by a few dollars, and feel free to haggle with buyers. The benefit of this selling method is that the buyer will pick up the item from you (no shipping!), but to be safe, you should meet them at a well-lit, crowded spot, like the coffee shop on your corner. If you are selling something large like a piece of furniture and must let the buyer in your home, make sure there is someone else there at the time- the world is full of freaky people, and one of them might show up at your door under the guise of buying your old boombox.


Gazelle.com: If you have old computers, cell phones, iPods, video games, PDAs or other electronics lying around, Gazelle.com wants to buy them from you. They will even send you secure prepaid packaging in which to return it to them, so you don't even have to worry about postage. I sold them an old laptop that was totally dead and a Palm Pilot that I had in the 90s, and they actually gave me money for them. Ironically, they even bought the cell phone I trashed. 


Second Spin: You know how all of your music is on your computer now? But you still have stacks and stacks of old CDs lying around taking up space, don't you? Second Spin will buy your used CDs and DVDs for a decent price. So you can clear out those drawers or shelves of all those ugly plastic cases (and put money there instead).


At Last Resort:  If you have stuff you can't sell, but is still redeemable (i.e. a whole bag of gently-worn Old Navy tank tops), there's still one thing you can do- give it away. Take it to a non-profit thrift shop (try Housing Works in NYC, or the Salvation Army nationwide) and get a receipt so you can deduct the donation from your taxes. It won't technically make you money, but it might save you a bit come April. Plus, it might actually help someone else out, too.

If you have never tried selling things, you'll be amazed at how fun, and oddly addictive, it is. Give it a try- I foresee your closets getting less cramped, and your wallets getting more so.

It's A Sign

In case you were wondering what I was up to during that lengthy period of time in August when I was not posting on the blog regularly, here's the answer: projects. Oh, sure, I did I certain amount of reading, suntanning and swimming (with the occasional wedding thrown in for good measure), but for the most part, when my mom and I get together, we end up doing projects. It's probably a good thing that we don't live in the same town because JM and my dad would forget what we look like without sawdust in our hair and paint on our faces. And this summer, one of our projects was creating signage. My family's lake cottage is in an old self-managed association where most things have a lovable, decaying, well-used quality to them. This year, we decided to class the place up a bit by replacing some of the more decomposed wooden signage that had been around since the (first) Roosevelt administration, and had become, essentially, unreadable. I like old signs as much as the next guy, but here's a tip: When you can't read them anymore, it's time to throw in the towel. But why hire a sign-maker, when you can easily make your own professional(ish)-looking painted signs yourself? With simple materials you can easily find, you can make signs for whatever your heart desires- house names, street numbers, "keep out- no boys allowed" for your treehouse- the possibilities are endless. Here are the easy-peasy steps we took to make our fancy new signs. And may they happily point the way and rot until my great-great-grandchildren replace them.




What you will need:
A piece of wood, cut to size
A computer print-out of what you want the sign to say, sized to fit
A piece of graphite transfer paper
Acrylic paint and a small flat-sided paintbrush
Varnish and a disposable sponge paintbrush

What you do:
  Step 1: Using your computer, print out the lettering for the sign in the size and font that you like (you may have to print it in several pieces and tape together, as I did). Place a piece of graphite transfer paper, graphite down, on your wooden board. Place the print-out on top, aligning how you like, and attaching it with tape to secure.

Step 2: Carefully trace the lettering on the print-out with a sharp pencil, pressing firmly. In case the photo at left has you perplexed, I do not have teeny-tiny hands- that is just an abnormally large pencil. For your purposes, any size pencil will do. Even a pen would probably be fine, come to think of it.

Step 3: Remove the print-out and graphite paper. I could have omitted this photo, and almost did, because it doesn't really illustrate anything and reveals that I messed up the placement of my graphite paper, and didn't transfer the top half of the word "courts". But I didn't because I wanted to show that everyone makes mistakes when doing projects, and it's no big thang- just fill in the tops of the letters freehand, and get on with it.Or, just place your graphite correctly in the first place.

Step 4: Using a thin paintbrush and your acrylic paint, carefully fill in over the lettering. The paint will cover the graphite. If you smudge, you will be able to wipe up the paint as long as it is still wet, so keep a rag at hand. Also, imperfections are part of the charm of homemade signs, so relax.

Step 5: Allow paint to dry completely. Cover entire piece of wood with varnish, and allow to dry until set. Hang or place your masterpiece and revel in your handiwork.

Redress the Problem

About this time every year, I fold up all my sweaters and coats and store them under the bed, and I pull out all my cute summer dresses. Before I hang them in the closet I do a little fashion show in front of the full-length mirror (I usually leave out the model walk, unless JM is home), and make sure that I still like them and think I'll wear them again. Most of them stand up to the challenge, but some just... don't. In some cases, it's hard to believe that my sense of fashion has changed so much in the eight months since I put the dress away- I think, "Did September Me really think this was a good look?"

Take, for example, this flouncy aqua dress I bought a couple years ago. I really thought it was cute back then, but in the fresh light of 2010, it looked more "Little House on the Prairie" than "Sex and the City". It wasn't all bad- I still liked the color, the shape of the strapless top, and the high waistline - but the voluminous tiered skirt that ended mid-calf and was more fatering than flattering. Not good.

Could this dress be saved?  I figured it was worth a shot. Using a seam ripper, I removed the bottom tier of the dress, and then stitched the seam into a hem using a sewing machine. Easy! And you can do it with any dress (or even shorts) that fall at unflattering lengths. If your dress doesn't have tiers, you can measure an even hem by using a measuring tape, marking the dress with pencil at even intervals, and then cutting between the marks. Depending on the fabric and how often you intend to wear it, you may not even have to hem it- although, iron-on seam binding works miracles if you aren't inclined to sew.

You know what they say: Dressperate times...

Stripper Lessons

Back in 2003 when I moved to New York, I was going through a real "Shabby Chic" phase where put linen slipcovers on all my furniture and painted everything white. Now that I'm a little older (ugh, where did those seven years go?), and have developed a more complex sense of style, it kills me to look at all that white paint and think of the pretty mahogany or oak hidden underneath it. So, slowly but surely, I am determined to remove as much of it as I can from the pretty antique pieces worth saving. I had been warned that stripping furniture is a messy, unpleasant and toxic job. To be clear, just breathing near these chemicals will likely take a few hours off your lifespan (just don't say I didn't tell you so when you're all light-headed afterward).  Ah, the price we pay for beauty. 

So, I decided to start small and strip a pretty mohogany mirror that my mom and I had picked up at an antiques mall back in the 90s. Obviously, JM was disappointed when I told him I was "stripping" and he came home to find me wearing a protective facemask and gloves and spraying noxious chemicals all over our patio, but he and I were both pretty pleased with the results- a mirror for our hallway that is very chic and decidedly not too shabby. And while I may not be able to finish the Times crossword puzzle anymore due to brain-cell death, the process was surprisingly easy.  Here's how to strip and refinish wood furniture (the stripping process is similar for metal, but the finishing would be different). I may just get started on.... wait, what was I talking about, again?

Step 1:Apply the stripper directly onto the painted surface. I used a spray stripper, but I've heard that there are paste/gels that work very well. I'm fake posing for the picture, but if you are actually using this stuff definitely wear gloves (trust me- this stuff will burn a whole in your hand). Spray it all over- don't be shy about it.

Step 2: After the amount of time specified on the container (usually 5-10 minutes) you'll notice that the paint is bubbling away from the surface. Use a plastic throw-away scraper trowel thingy to scrape off the paint. This is a very satisfying process. When you finish, there will likely be a few stubborn patches (usually in corners and seams). Just apply more stripper to those spots, and repeat the process.

Step 3: Using a fine sandpaper, sand the whole piece, removing any last bits of paint and varnish that are on there. Be thorough, lazybones.

Step 4: Using a disposable brush (and wearing those gloves again, please), apply a stain to all of the wood. Let it sit for 10 minutes, then wipe it off with a clean rag. If you would like it be to darker, repeat this process until you have reached your desired shade.  Let dry completely (at least overnight).  If desired, apply a coat of polyurethane finish to give it a glossy look.

Enjoy the stripshow.

Tired Out

When I was in high school, and friend of mine blew a tire down the street from my house. She called AAA on her car phone, but they were backed up and said they couldn't get there for an hour. So she called me and said, "Of all of my friends, you are the one I would expect to know how to change a tire". It was one of the nicest compliments anyone could have given me, and I was so flattered I said I'd be right there. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I really had no idea how to change a tire.  My dad wasn't home, and this was in the days before you could find the answer to anything on helpful blogs on the internet (If you're doing mental math thinking, "Hmmm... car phone, no internet... the mid-90s?," stop it, please). So I went in blind, fooled around with the jack, got my favorite Express jeans and my hands all dirty, and managed to get half the lug nuts off before AAA arrived. On that day, I vowed that I wasn't just going to be the kind of person who people think can change a tire, but would become someone who actually could.
And now I pass that can-do spirit on to you. Feel free to print this out and put it in your glove box. You'll be able to fix your tire and get back on the road in no time...flat.

Step 1: Get to safety. Pull the car as far off the main part of the road as possible, without allowing any wheels to go onto soft dirt or sloped ground.  Ideally you want all four tires to be on flat, solid ground, on a straight part of the road where approaching cars can see you from a distance. Turn on your emergency flasher lights, and get any passengers out of the car and safely away from the road. Secure the car from rolling- put on the emergency break, and, if you can find one, put a heavy rock or brick in front of the front tire (if you are fixing a rear tire) or the rear tire (if you are fixing a front tire).

Step 2: Get your tools out of the trunk.  You should find a spare tire, a lug wrench, and a jack (if it's after dark you may also need a flashlight). Place the jack under the frame of the car near the tire that you need to change. Make sure it is on the metal (NOT plastic) part of the frame.  When in doubt, get low and take a peek under the car- on most cars there will be groove marks just behind the front wheel wells, and in front of the rear wheel wells which indicate where the jack should go. Once it is in place, raise the jack so that it is supporting, but not lifting the car.

Step 3: Remove the hubcabs and use the lugwrench to loosen (but not remove) the lug nuts. (Remember: lefty loosey, righty tighty) The nuts might be on there real tight, so you might need to step on the wrench to get them loose.

Step 4: Raise the jack until it lefts the tire about 6 inches off the ground.  Don't stop just because the flat tire is off the ground- you will need more clearance to get the inflated tire on. As you lift, make sure the car is stable and not moving.

Step 5: Fully remove the lug nuts (you can use the hubcap as a dish to hold them, just make sure you don't pull a Christmas Story and send them flying into the road). Pull the flat tire off- it's easiest if you put your hands on either side of the tire and pull it straight toward your chest.

Step 6: Put the new tire on, aligning the tire bolts with the holes on the tire. Put on the lug nuts and tighten by hand. Use the lugwrench to tighten the bolts, but not all the way- tighten them a little at a time, going around in a "star" pattern, until they are equally tight.

Step 7: Lower the car to the ground, and re-tighten the lug nuts. Remove the jack and replace the hubcap. Put all your tools back in the trunk, and remove any blocks from the tires.

Step 8: Let your friends get back in the car, take off the emergency brake and get back on the road! Make sure to call me on the car phone and let me know you're okay.

Take the Plunge

I've been contemplating writing this post for months, but keep managing to delay its publication. Why? Because I like writing about pretty, pleasant things, and this is decidedly not that. But, on further evaluation, I have decided that this is a skill that every self-reliant person must have in his or her arsenal. It's happened to almost everyone (and probably will again) - you are at a restaurant or a friend's house, you put a little too much of something down the toilet, and suddenly you are trapped in a small bathroom with a rapidly filling toilet and a party waiting for you outside the door. Handled incorrectly, this nastiness can result an extremely embarrassing and, ahem, crappy situation. But handled correctly, you'll be back at the cocktail party in no time, with no one the wiser.

How To Unclog A Toilet

1. Don't Panic. Stop jiggling the handle and trying to flush- you'll only cause more water to fill the bowl and potentially overflow it. Resist the urge to climb out the window and run home. If the water level is still rising, look on the wall behind the toilet for a knob and turn it all the way to the right. This will turn off the water flowing to the toilet. Lift any rugs, mats or linens off the bathroom floor and hang them over a rod or hook, just in case things get messy.

2. Start Bailing. If the water level is full to the top of the bowl, you will need to remove some of it. This is super gross, but find a cup, dish or bowl in the bathroom to use as a bailing tool, and remove enough water bring the water level down a few inches.

3. Plunge In. Grab a plunger. You will want to use the flange kind (as opposed to the cup kind, which is for sinks). If you are at someone else's house, pray that they are well-prepared and that your karma is in order, so that there is already a plunger in the bathroom. Otherwise, use your cell phone to call your husband or closest friend at the party, and have them discreetly ask the hosts for one (I am literally blushing as I type this, I feel so sorry for you, and it isn't even happening for real). Put the suction cup end into the toilet, covering the hole forming as good a seal as you can. Vigorously plunge the handle up and down several times, as hard as you can. Really put some muscle into it. (You may want to run water in the sink while you are doing this to mask the sound). Repeat until the water starts to drain from the toilet (Congrats- that means the clog has cleared).

4. Clean and Clear. Turn the water back on, and flush the toilet until the bowl is clean and cleared out. Use toilet paper to wipe up any spilled water (ugh), return the mats to the floor, and then thoroughly wash and scrub your hands and arms up to your elbows. Take a deep breath, reapply your lipstick, and then walk out of the bathroom like nothing happened.

Don't-Bleed-Your-Wallet-Dry Cleaning

There's a reason the expression "taken to the cleaners" means ripped off. And that reason is that dry cleaning, while a necessary part of life if you want to look presentable, can be insanely expensive. Sometimes I literally find myself thinking, I bought this sweater at H&M for $19. Am I really about to spend $10 to get it cleaned? Because I'm cheap like that. It's a fierce battle, but usually my cheapness trumps my laziness, and I end up washing the darn thing myself. And while, for your sanity, certain garments are best left to the professionals (like suits, anything with heavy beading or embellishments or a ton of pleats) there are ways to limit the amount of dough you have to shell out, and take some shortcuts at home.* Plus, dry cleaning chemicals are toxic (do you really want them all over your clothes?) and harmful to the environment, so limiting your dry cleaning habit is good for your bank account, your health and the planet. Here are the techniques I employ at home to keep my wallet from getting cleaned out.

1. Read the Labels: If the label says "dry clean" that means you can definitely wash it at home. If it says "dry clean only" there's still a chance that you can clean it yourself. A general rule is that wool, acrylic, cashmere, cotton and polyester can be easily washed at home. Silk and rayon require a little more care, but can sometimes be hand-washed.

2. Use Your Dryer: If the clothes are unstained and just kind of maloderous (due to last night's trip to a cigar bar, or your sprint for the bus), you can use one of the at-home dry cleaning kits at work in your dryer: Dryel or FreshCare. Read the instructions, but they are generally safe with most fabrics, and will leave your clothes unwrinkled, and smelling fresher than if you spray them with Febreze.

3. Handwash Your Sweaters: Here's a secret- hand-washing actually will make your wool and cashmere sweaters softer. Just fill a deep sink or bathtub with room temperature water (not hot!), and add your sweater to it. Put in a small amount of soap (Woolite is nice, but you can also use a gentle shampoo), and gently spot treat just using your hands and by rubbing the fabric against itself. After the sweater has soaked for a while and is clean, rinse them with cool water and lay them flat on a clean towel, then roll the towel to dry. Allow the sweater to lay flat until dry. To save time, do several sweaters at once.

4. Silky tops: Use the same method as with sweaters to wash your silk items, but after you rinse them, pat them dry with a towel and hang on a padded hanger to dry.

*I also take personal umbrage that our dry cleaning establishment will wash and press my husband's shirts for $1.50 each, while my button-up collared shirts are categorized as "blouses" and cost $6. If I were less lazy, I would start a boycott based on the sexism inherent in that, but then I'd be stuck washing and pressing all JM's shirts myself. And they deliver for free, so I'll give them a pass.

photo credit: Nanopedia.case.edu - a site dedicated to the idea of using nanotechnology to create self-cleaning fabrics. So hopefully this whole post will soon be moot.

No Ifs, Ands or Buttons

Maybe we haven't known each other that long, but I like you, and I don't want to see you played for a fool. That's why I think it's imperative that you stop throwing your money away sending clothes to the tailor that you could easily fix yourself for free. You know who you are- your skirt gets a little droopy hem, or you pop a spaghetti strap on the dance floor, or, worst of all, a button falls off your fave cardy, and you immediately go running to the professionals.
All of these sewing tasks are totally simple and entirely doable by you as long as you have a very basic sewing kit and at least one finger and thumb. And each of them can be accomplished in the time it takes one American Idol contestant to butcher your favorite song (you might even be grateful for the distraction).
Luckily, I found this illustration on Esquire.com, and I figure if their readers are up to the task of rebuttoning themselves, so are mine. So I stole it, because I am not above theft when it comes to helping my friends. Don't worry, you can pay me back later.

Step 1. Thread your needle with a thread that matches the button (or whatever color has been used on the other buttons) Don't worry if the color is slightly off (i.e. navy vs. black)- no one will ever notice. Double the thread over and tie the ends together in a knot. Find the exact spot where the button should go by matching it up with the button hole. Insert the needle through the fabric from the back (so the knot doesn't show on the front), and stitch an "X" to anchor the button.

Step 2: Thread the needle through one of the holes in the button (if the button has 4 holes, take note of how the garment's other buttons are sewn on- do the stitches form an "X" or two parallel lines- you will want to copy it so this button matches). Then stitch up and down through the holes in the button and the fabric loosely at least 4 or 5 times, keeping the button pulled about 1/8 - 1/4" away from the fabric (you can insert a toothpick or matchstick to help you keep the right distance).

Step 3: When the button feels well affixed, thread the needle down through one of the holes in the button, but not through the fabric, so the thread is coming out from between the button and the fabric. Then wind the thread around the loose stitches several times (this creates a "shank" and leaves enough space for the button hole without putting pressure on the fabric).

Step 4. Insert the needle through the wound shank you have created a few times, securing the thread. Snip the loose thread near the shank with scissors so there are no loose ends. Ain't that a kick in the buttons?

Here's a bonus tip: Keep a glass jar with a lid (like a mustard or baby food jar) in your sewing kit. When a garment comes with extra buttons, add them to the jar. Pretty soon you'll have a large enough collection to replace almost any fastener that goes missing. Plus a jars of buttons make for pretty cute objets in my fantasy craft room.

Photo credit: Country Living
Illustration credit: Esquire.com

The Great Closet Clean-Out

Anyone who has lived in Manhattan (other than you, Donald Trump) is familiar with the concept of the "all-purpose closet". Because closet space (well, space in general, really) is at such a premium, you end up forcing disparate categories of your stuff to cohabitate in closets. In my old apartment, for instance, the sheets and towels lived on the top shelf of a closet that also housed our liquor cabinet, garlic, potatoes, and onions, and our cleaning products. It was a foul and potentially toxic combo, but an unavoidable one. In our new apartment, we are a little better positioned in terms of closet space, but not by much. This is particularly the case in my kitchen pantry closet, which, until recently, had become a sort of dumping ground for anything that wasn't clothes in our apartment. This was where paper towels rubbed shoulders with orphaned power cords and an old bundt pan served as a container for batteries and owner's manuals for phones we no longer used. Where sometimes I would go days before changing the empty water cooler bottle because we couldn't find it. Basically, if you can imagine shoving a whole Costco into a closet, this is what it would look like. It was a rugged and lawless place, sort of like the Deadwood of closets. It was impossible to find anything (or even touch anything, really) without setting off an avalanche of junk I didn't even know I had. The last straw was placed on this camel's back the day I realized that I couldn't get the doors to stay closed anymore. I literally could no longer hide my dirty secret from the world, and it was time I do something about it.
So, I did what any self-respecting person with a problem closet should do: I grabbed my husband's credit card and zipped over to my own personal mecca, The Container Store. Five hours, two carts, and one serious swipe of the AmEx later (just think of the points, honey!), I had everything I needed to transform my crazy closet into a haven of fastidiousness and order. Here are the products I ended up using to whip things into shape. Not only can I find and access everything easily, now, but I find I actually have more space, with plenty of room left for whatever falls out the next time I open one of my other closets.

1. Container Store Plastic Bins, $1.50- $10. These bins are super-durable and lightweight and they come in a million shapes and sizes. I used them to sort all my stuff- tablecloths got one, vacuum parts and accessories went into one, and bakeware into another. I used smaller ones for things like cupcake liners, batteries, and taper candles.
2. The Grook Utility hanger, $20, from the Container Store. This hanger attached to the back of the door and holds the mop, broom, duster and pan, as well as smaller things we use all the time, like Skip's leashes.
3. P-Touch label maker, $49, from Staples. I love this thing so much I would let it sleep in the bed with us. You should seriously get one - all that organizing is only useful if you know where to find everything when you're done.
4. Ironing Board and Iron Hanger, $10, from the Container Store. Gone are the days when the ironing board would open up and fall on me when I opened the closet! No longer will I ever have to listen to my husband say, "Where's the iron?," because he was too afraid to go into the closet himself. Now it's just like at a fancy hotel. Or the Motel 6.
5. Wire shelving unit, $21, from Target. With all that stuff, I needed extra shelf space to keep it organized. I found this inexpensive unit at Target years ago, and finally put it to good use.
6. SimpleHuman grocery bag organizer, $10, from the Container Store. I mounted one of these suckers on the back of the door and it holds a ton of plastic grocery bags. We keep them to reuse, and now we can actually find them.
7. Scrapbook Cart, $59, from the Container Store. We removed the wheels from this thing, and use each one of the plastic compartments to hold all of our electronics and their accouterments. We sorted all the cords, memory cards, manuals, and chargers by type and purpose (and got rid of ones if we didn't know what they did). We call it the Box O' Technology.

A Living Hall

I spend most of my time on this blog talking about the little day-to-day things I do around here just to make sure we have food to eat and clean clothes, and that we don't step on sharp or squishy things on our way to the bathroom in the middle of the night. And, trust me, there's enough of that kind of chores to keep me plenty busy every day. But along the way, I am also in the process of tackling bigger projects while fixing up and decorating our apartment. Some things I save up to pay experts to do (like refinishing our wood floors - not that I think I couldn't do it myself, I'm just pretty sure I wouldn't want to), but others I research and tackle myself. Okay, and sometimes I make my mom help me when she thinks she's just coming for a fun visit, as is the case with the facelift we gave our entrance hall this fall (better than Heidi Montag's, I contend). There are a lot of wonderful details in our prewar walk-up apartment that make it feel special and distinct. Sadly, our entrance hall was not one of them. It was boring, bland and white, with (before I installed the chandelier) ugly recessed lighting, and a big, ugly electrical box that stuck out like a sore thumb.
Once you made your way past the hallway, you were able to see the loveliness within, but, I was always a little disappointed in the dreary first impression the hallway gave. To liven it up, give the hall its own identity, and take advantage of the tall ceilings, I decided to add wainscoting on the lower part of the walls, and a bright, peppy wallpaper above it. After a lot of nail-biting, and navel-gazing, and hemming and hawing, and inner-contemplation, vacillation and dithering, I finally settled on a paper, with which I am unequivocally pleased. (The wallpaper is Favenay Cream from Pierre Deux. I painted the wainscoting Benjamin Moore Navajo White in Semi-Gloss to match the background of the paper). The results were better than I had imagined, and, as an added bonus, the vibrant pattern on the wallpaper works as virtual camouflage for the electrical box. Here are the simple steps to get this same look for your apartment or house - you will need some basic tools (even if you have to buy them, it will still cost way less than paying someone to do this for you) and carpentry skills (which you can learn by doing), and one free weekend (or, maybe less, if you are able to rope your mom into the project).

You Will Need:
Tools:
measuring tape
chalk
stud finder
hammer
finish nails
nail sinker
drill
wood screws
handsaw and miter box
jigsaw (optional, but helpful)
level
Spackle

Lumber: (quantity of all lumber will depend on the size of the area you are covering):
1" x 6" or 1" x 8" boards
Baseboard molding (click on links for examples, if you don't know what I'm talking about)
Chair-rail molding
5/8- 3/4" decorative molding


Step 1: Remove any molding that is currently on the wall (I use a hammer and a flat-head screwdriver driven between the molding and the wall- it'll pop right off). Use your measuring tape and chalk to arrange the dimensions of the molding, until you are happy with it (Just remember that a 1x6 is actually only 5-1/2 inches wide, and a 1x8 is only 7 -1/4 inches wide).







Step 2: Measure and cut a length of 1x6 exactly the length of your wall (remember- measure twice, cut once!) Use the stud finder to find the studs in the wall, and attach the piece of 1x6 to the wall using your drill and wood screws, driven into the stud at the top of where you want your wainscoting to be. Make sure it is level. Do the same with the side and bottom pieces. Make sure you sand the ends of your cuts so they meet up as smoothly as possible.






Step 3: Cut a piece of chair rail the width of the wall, and attach it to the very top of the front of the 1x6 frame. Measure a piece of the floorboard, and do the same. Measure and cut the decorative molding to fit the interior of the 1x6 frame. Use the miter box to cut the ends at 45 degree angles, so the four pieces fit inside at right angles. Nail these in with finishing nails and use the nail sinker to sink the nails into the wood. Don't worry if everything doesn't line up perfect-perfect- that's what the Spackle is for. Use it now to fill in any gaps and all the nail holes- this is a good job for Mom. Paint all of the molding with a primer.







Step 4: Be sure to paint the wainscoting completely before wallpapering the upper portion of the wall, so you don't have to worry about getting paint on it. I'll do another post about how to wallpaper, but this should keep you and your mom busy for a while.

I Am Resolute

Well, here we are, back to our normal lives. We flew back from California on a redeye this morning. Now, my husband, JM, is back at work, the tree is all dried out (despite my best efforts, the poor thing can't water itself), the confetti has been swept up, and it seems laundry, dust, and reality are raining down from the sky in its place. But all is not lost. With the new year comes the opportunity for new beginnings and new pursuits, and I have been working on determining what mine will be. While we were in California, JM tried surfing and yoga for the first time (when in Rome...), and succeeded at both riding waves and balancing in Warrior II pose, so he is already well ahead of me.

I put a lot of thought into my resolutions, because, unlike some of you procrastinators out there, I actually accomplish them. Exhibit A: My resolutions from last year. Run a marathon? Did it. Cook less chicken? Yep. Get a dog? Did I ever. Be a good friend? Well, at least I'm a good hostess. Keep this blog fun and useful? Well, it's still fun for me!

So, without further ado, here are this year's almost-certain-to-be-accomplished resolutions.
1. Timing Is Everything. I recognize that I have a major shortcoming when it comes to time management. For example, I started this post at 11 a.m., but have gotten distracted and interrupted so many times that I still haven't finished it. I'm going to start using (and referencing) my iPhone calendar to schedule my life, and start being more consistently on time.
2. Train My Dog. I have already taught her to sit, lie down, wait, shake hands, stand on her back feet, and "hold it" while indoors (unless she gets really excited). Now, I want to take an obedience class and work on keeping her from jumping up on people and trying to lick their faces (or eat JM's dinner off the coffee table). Once she masters that, maybe I'll teach her to jump-rope.
3. Sell my Stuff on eBay. I have more "stuff"- clothes I don't wear anymore, appliances I don't have room for, tools I never use - than I have valued items I actually use and enjoy. It's time to stop spending all our hard-earned cash on eBay, and start making cash off it, instead.

This year's resolutions may seem a little less ambitious than last year's, but my life is so good right where it is, I can hardly think of anything major to change! Here's hoping for another successful year.

How did you do on last year's resolutions, and what are you going to do this year? Do tell!

I'm The Firestarter

One of the nice things about the chill of fall is that we are able to make use of the two lovely fireplaces we have in our apartment (yes, that was me bragging just now). Hauling firewood up four flights of stairs is sort of ridiculous, but worth it once you get that warm, glowing fire burning.
My husband, JM, considers himself a bit of a fire-making expert. (And I usually have the good taste to bite my tongue about the Great Valentine's Day Smoke-Out of 2003. Hey, everybody makes mistakes.)
JM has his own special method that consistently (except that one time) works like a charm in creating a long-lasting, beautiful-looking fire that lights right up. I made him teach me how he does it, since I'm such a know-it-all and not the kind of girl who likes to sit back and have things done for me. (Why am I not that kind of girl? My life would be so much easier...) And now I teach it to you, so you, too, can be a pyro-maestro. But lest you start feeling sorry for my husband, what with me edging him out of his favorite job, and blabbing his secret techniques on the Internet, don't worry -- I still let him carry the wood.

How to Light a Fire in a Fireplace

1. Start by taking a sheet of newspaper and rolling it loosely on the diagonal into a long strip and then tying it in a knot. Make 3 or 4 of these newspaper knots, and then stuff them under the fireplace grate (something about the way they are rolled makes them burn much longer and better than wadded up newspaper, which, JM asserts, is for amateurs).

2. If you have some, place some kindling, like small sticks or pine cones on top of the grate. JM insists you do not need kindling, as long as your wood is dry enough, but I always use a little, just in case.

3. Arrange your logs on top of the kindling. JM says the best arrangement is with three logs to start. Place the first two logs parallel to one another and about 2 inches apart. Place the third one on top of the first two, at a diagonal angle. This arrangement is compact enough that the fire will spread from log to log, but leaves enough air around each log to keep the fire fed.

4. Make sure the flue is open (look up the chimney, and you will see a little lever which opens and closes a hatch. The hatch must be open, or you will flood the whole room in smoke, which is decidedly unromantic). You also have to make sure that the chimney is drawing (a downdraft in the chimney will also make the smoke move in the wrong direction). To do this, take another piece of newspaper, roll it up and light the end on fire. Hold the flame up to the chimney, and warm the air there, until you see the smoke being pulled up the chimney.

5. Use the piece of burning newspaper to ignite the newspaper knots in the fireplace. Sit back, relax and enjoy your roaring fire.


photo credit: www.ukhomeideas.co.uk

That's The Rub

I'm a firm believer that everyone, at some point in their lives, should learn to give a decent backrub. And I place emphasis on the word decent -- I'm not about to instruct you in the art of sensual massage, here (sorry if that comes as a disappointment to you). Whether it's after a long day hunched over your keyboard at work, or after a powdery morning on the slopes, everyone needs a good rubdown from time to time. But there is are few things more disappointing than going to all of the trouble to con someone into giving you one, only to find that they have clammy palms, weak fingers and no finesse. It does seem like backrubs are something that everyone likes to get, but no one really likes to give. But, as is frequently the case, once you master some simple techniques, and you become comfortable and confident in what you're doing, it can actually be a lot of fun (and no weird rubber hose required!).

When it comes to backrubs (as with everything in life), it seems the more you give, the more you get.

How to Give a Good Backrub
1. Have the intended beneficiary of your magic fingers lie or sit down in a comfortable position. Lying on an elevated surface (so you can reach them without hunching over) or sitting in a backless chair in front of you are good options. There is really no need for you to straddle them or any of that nonsense, as people often do- I think that's more of an intended seduction technique gone awry.
2. Alternate the following techniques. All of them will work fine through a shirt, but if you are massaging someone with whom you are intimate, you can have them remove their shirt and use a massage oil.
a) Begin by pressing the heels of your hands in on either side of the spine and slowly and firmly running them up the top of the back. When you get to the shoulders, turn your wrists so your fingers are pointed toward the armpits, and slowly work your way back down.
b) Press your thumbs into the back on the inside of the shoulder blades, and working them in small circles, work your way along the spine up onto the muscles in the neck.
c) In places where there is a lot of flesh (like the shoulders and lower neck), firmly grasp the muscle between your fingers and your thumb and (without pinching!) knead the muscle. Don't be afraid to work the muscle deeply, but make sure the recipient is comfortable.
d) Press your fingertips into the flesh at the top of the back (just the tips, not the fingernails- remember, this isn't that kind of massage), and pull down, raking your fingertips down on either side of the spine, stretching the muscles.

Here are some tips:
- Once you begin the backrub, keep at least one hand on the recipient at all times- it will keep them comfortable with your touch.
- Be aware of the recipient's ticklish spots, and stay away from them. Otherwise, you'll leave them more tense then when you started.
- If your hands are easily tired, or the thought of massaging someone with your actual hands creeps you out, buy one of these little massagers, from Koziol. They feel almost as good as the real thing (and much better than nothing!) $17, from Verbena.net

photo credit: borrowed from getty images.

Get Toasted

While it may seem like I run my mouth off without much inhibition, I actually have a major phobia of a certain kind of public speaking: the premeditated kind. In college, I had no qualms about asking questions off the cuff in a lecture class in front of 200 people (you know, when I showed up), but put me in a small seminar class with ten people and ask us to go around in a circle and introduce ourselves, and by the time it's my turn, I will be sitting in a puddle of sweat, and barely remember my own name. And the anxiety and nervousness is directly proportionate to the length of time I am anticipating giving the speech. So I am intimately aware of the particular brand of stress that giving a toast can bring. It's one of the downsides of having friends and family that you care about (that and having to remember birthdays), that eventually, you will likely have to raise a glass and say a few words in their honor, be it to your hosts at an intimate dinner party or the couple at a large anniversary party or wedding. It's a cruel, cruel world.
But giving a toast needn't be all that anxiety-producing (or, at least, no one needs to know how apprehensive you are). Just follow these simple rules, and you'll properly honor your friends and make new ones left and right, who will, in turn, request you make toasts at their special occasions. It's a vicious cycle, so you might as well get comfortable with it.

Act Confident. Even if you are shaking in your stilettos, do your best not to let on. Speak clearly and loud enough for your voice to carry to the people in the back. It doesn't matter how great your toast is if no one can hear you, or they are too distracted by your shaky voice and sweaty brow to pay attention to what you're saying. No matter how tempting, don't turn to liquid courage; have no more than one drink before your toast- trust me, there is nothing worse than a drunk with a microphone. Lastly, try to remember that everyone present loves the honoree(s), and wants to see them properly honored. They are looking to you to do that, and rooting for you, and wishing you success.
Be Prepared. Give yourself time to think about what you want to say. Write down your ideas and form an outline. Practice what you want to say in front of the mirror. But, when the big day comes, try to work from just notes and fill in. Reading your toast off a sheet of paper comes off as amateurish and it's hard to make eye contact and a personal connection when your eyes are glued to a piece of notepaper. A good general outline: 1. Introduce yourself and your relationship to the honoree (this is unnecessary at gatherings of less than 25 people). 2. Express your happiness and pleasure at being able to speak at the event and thank your hosts. 3. Tell a cute or meaningful anecdote in the spirit of the occasion, ideally one that paints the honoree in a positive light. 4. Raise your glass, and ask everyone to join you in toasting the honoree. Done and done.
Brevity, Please. Seriously, your entire toast should be no more than five minutes at a wedding, and no more than two minutes at a more intimate dinner, people. Time yourself when you're practicing to make sure you don't go on too long. I lied before, there is something worse than a drunk with a microphone - a drunk with a microphone for twenty minutes.
Keep It Clean, Sincere and Positive. No matter how funny a story you have about the groom from the bachelor party, this is not the place for it. This should go without saying, but stay away from any "blue" content, swear words, politics, or anything controversial or potentially offensive. Humor is great, but keep the content positive and warm. Remember- it's a toast not a roast.

Good luck, and cheers!

A Perfect Arrangement

I'm in California this week to help my friend, Lea, make the final preparations for her wedding this weekend. In honor of this auspicious occasion, and because this is our last wedding of the season, I have decided to make this "Wedding Week" on the blog. Don't worry if you aren't a bride- or groom-to-be, however -- I'll try to make this week's post applicable to the soon-to-be-hitched, already-wed, and don't-believe-in-the-institution-of-marriage, alike. Today's topic: tasty cocktails.

I love flowers. I love growing them, picking them, smelling them, wearing them in my hair, displaying them around my house. I love all of them: from expensive orchids to clovers that grow like weeds in the park. And, for crying out loud, my name is Lily. So naturally, when Lea told me that she planned to arrange the flowers for her wedding herself and asked if I would help, I said an enthusiastic "yes". Lea is by nature very laid-back and I knew she wouldn't expect, or even want, Florist-like perfection from the flowers we arranged. She even chose to buy all of them at the local Farmer's Market, opting to be surprised and use whatever was available at the time, rather than order specific varieties ahead of time from a floral supply. Here are the basic instructions for how to make beautiful flower arrangements for special occasions or just everyday loveliness. All of that said, ladies, unless you have an equally laid-back attitude, and a friend who loves flowers as much as I do, I don't recommend trying this for your own wedding.

How to Arrange Flowers

1. When buying flowers, try to choose blooms within a complimentary group of colors. Also, make sure to buy some big, showy blooms, like large roses, dahlias, or these pretty Gerbera daisies I am picking out at the Farmer's Market in the photo at right, some smaller blooms (like spray roses or cosmos), and some foliage to fill in.

2. Choose your vessels thoughtfully. Low vessels are great for holding tight ball-shaped arrangements like that at top. Or, if you want something tall and dramatic, obviously choose a vase accordingly.

3. Fill the vase about 3/4 full with room-temperature water. If you are preparing arrangements in advance for an event, use cold water to keep the blooms fresh. If the flower-seller gave you flower food, put that in the water.

4. Start with the large blooms. Cut each stem to the length where it will fit attractively in the vase, arranging each bloom so there are some facing in all directions, making the arrangement attractive from all sides.

5. Fill in the spaces between the large blooms with the smaller blooms. Then, fill in the spaces between the smaller blooms with the foliage. Rotate the arrangement one last time to make sure it looks good from all sides. If anything is sticking out too far, trim the stem to make things even.

6. Love those flowers!

Photo credits: Arrangement: Country Living, Me: Amelia Partridge

A Rental Note

My bedroom in my first rental apartment (c. 2004). Note the painted walls, rug, framed art, curtains, headboard and pretty lighting fixture. Ignore the copious amounts of toile - it was a phase I was going through.

Okay, so, if this isn't your first time reading my ramblings, you probably already know that my husband, JM, and I bought our first apartment last year and are reveling (okay, and sometimes kicking ourselves) in the process of fixing everything up just how we want it. But, what you probably don't know is that we weren't always fancy homeowner types. In fact, before this we wallowed away five years in a rental apartment, which had a lot of quirks we had to learn to live with, and that we did our best to overcome (for instance, a galley kitchen with literally no counter space* - and I mean that "literally" literally). But what I discovered during those years was that just because you live in a rental doesn't mean you can't personalize and decorate it to your tastes. With a little imagination, and a little elbow grease, any rental can be made to feel like home. And while most of these fixes are inexpensive and some are a little more pricey, they are worth the investment because almost all of them can be removed, packed up, and brought with you to your next rental. So get to it, and make yourself at home.

9 Ways to Personalize A Rental Apartment (Without Losing Your Security Deposit).


1. Watch Paint Dry: Nothing says "boring rental apartment" like plain white walls. Your rental agreement may forbid you to paint them another color, but that doesn't mean you can't change them now and then change them back before you move out. If you are going to be living in your place for a year or less, it's a lot of work to paint a whole room (although not as much as you may think- it only takes an afternoon), but you might consider painting just one wall a bold color, like red, to make a real statement. Putting a pretty color on the walls is the fastest and easiest way to make an apartment feel decorated and homey. And it can cure all kinds of problems: We painted our living room a soft sunny yellow, and you could hardly tell that it was 36 square feet and had no windows. Well, at least it helped.
2. Take the Floor: Another dead giveaway of a standard-issue rental is a standard-issue parquet floor. There's nothing wrong with wood flooring, but in most rentals the the floors have taken a sustained beating over the years and have become severely worn and scuffed. Cover those spots with soft, comfortable rugs and you'll feel like you're in a cozy cottage as you pad your way to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Click here for my tips on successful rug-buying.
3. Get Framed: If you are over the age of 20, and no longer live in a dorm, I must implore you to stop putting unframed things on your wall. You can find inexpensive standard-sized frames to hold you photos, posters and other artworks at any homegoods store or Walmart/Kmart/Target. Or look into removable wall decals. Just make sure you put something on the walls, or it will feel like you're living in an institution. Click here for more of my arty suggestions.
4. Built-In Style: If you want your apartment to have that "a smart person lives here" look, you are going to need to find a place to put your books (other than in piles under the coffee table). For tons of extra storage, you can fake the look of built-in bookshelves with large bookcases that take up a whole wall. Check out the "Expedit" from Ikea (at right), or the inexpensive offerings from Gothic Cabinet Craft.
5. Bed of the Class: Your bedroom should be more than just where you sleep and leave your clothes on the floor. It should be your sanctuary; your den of relaxation and meditation. And that all starts with your bed. For crying out loud, buy yourself a decent mattress and sheets, and make your bed look like something. I recommend buying an inexpensive headboard, or using this pillow trick to fake the look of one. I also love a good swing-arm lamp beside the bed to make your boudoir a comfortable and functional place to work and read. And they mount to the wall with just a couple screws and plug in (no electrical work required).
6. Light It Up: Most rental apartments come with some seriously unpleasant lighting. If it's not ugly fluorescent ceiling fixtures, than it's too-bright bathroom lights that emphasize your flaws and make you feel like death warmed over as you head out the door to work. Believe it or not, changing out the light fixtures and installing dimmer switches in your apartment is a relatively easy process, which has a huge impact on the overall feeling and mood of the place (imagine leaving for work every morning feeling smokin' hot, instead). You can find great cheap fixtures on eBay. Just remember to carefully save and store the old fixture so you can reinstall it when you move out.
7. Hardware The Heart Is. A lot of rentals have god-awful kitchen cabinetry and closet doors. While changing those parts falls far into the "not worth it" category, you can put lipstick on the proverbial pig by changing out the hardware. You'd be surprised to see what a huge difference a cute knob or drawer-pull can make. Click here for great resources.
8. It's Curtains for You: Most rental apartments don't come with drapes (usually they have infuriating malfunctioning dusty blinds, if anything). So if you would like to avoid providing a free peep show to the neighborhood, you are going to have to hang something anyway. Luckily, a pretty curtain rod with some simple drapes can do a lot to create ambiance in a room (heavy pleated ones give an air of old-fashioned sophistication, light-colored sheers are soft and beachy). Look on eBay for pretty ones from Pottery Barn or Restoration Hardware for cheap prices. Or try your hand at sewing some.
9. Bloomin' Beautiful: If you want your apartment to feel like a place where people really live, it helps to have some real living things in it. A few well-selected houseplants can go a long way toward making an apartment feel warm and alive. I suggest a long-living orchid, a hard-to-kill succulent, or a self-maintaining terrarium like that at right.

*Oh, and if you are wondering what I did to make that counter-less kitchen work, I bought this over-the-sink cutting board and this Ikea chopping-block cart. Intsa-kitchen.